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I know the coming year is going to be a hard time for many people and most of us will wish we did not live in such times. But, as Gandalf said, these things are not for us to decide. The only thing for us to decide is whether you would rather

  • Fight a chicken every time you got in a car (58%, 14 votes)
  • Fight an orangutan with a sword once a year (41%, 10 votes)
24 voters. Poll end: 1 mese fa

in reply to Yes that BridgeMakes ⚪

do I get a year before the first orangutan fight because I am not sure about my chances against one even with a sword. And also, does the chicken likewise get time to prepare?
in reply to Callie

@pidgeon_pete i hadn't considered this while writing it but English is imprecise here. I ment the orangutan had a sword but I suppose it might be best is both of you had swords to make it more even.

But no, noone gets preparation time it's an orangutan at a random point in the year or every time you get in a car a chicken will try and fight you there and then.

in reply to Yes that BridgeMakes ⚪

what constitutes a fight? Like, can I just bob and weave for a few minutes? Can I just flick the orangutan on the ear?
in reply to Nathan

@herrold come on, you know that won't count.

It has to be enough that a Klingon would call it an honourable duel

in reply to Yes that BridgeMakes ⚪

are these honorable members of their representative species?

Okay, okay. Man, I'm trying to get out of fictiously beating up an animal.

Am I just driving around with an Abuse-Chicken? This is a recipe for a poor driving experience.

in reply to Yes that BridgeMakes ⚪

I'd rather fight a tiny dinosaur daily than someone who could rip my arms off.
in reply to roofuskit

@roofuskit so you would rather abuse countless weak animals than fight one that has a chance? Ok, sick'o
in reply to roofuskit

@roofuskit @New Year, New BridgeMakes ⚪ having been attacked by a chicken once and having lost¹, I'm not sure that the tiny dinosaur would be the safer option.

¹ admittely, I was a small child. OTOH the chicken was just warning me to get away from the chicks and had not deployed her weapons yet.

in reply to Yes that BridgeMakes ⚪

I read this as “octogenarian” and voted accordingly. Having read it correctly, I’m still on Team Fight a Chicken, but for different reasons.
in reply to Jamie

@Jamie whether to fight an octogenarian would depend on the question "which octogenarian?" I'm sure there are some that really deserve a good punch.

On the other hand I can only say that about one orangutan.

Yes JoJo, I'm talking about you, you ginger prick!

in reply to Yes that BridgeMakes ⚪

@New Year, New BridgeMakes ⚪ @Jamie (he/she/they) I suspect that in this context the answer to “which octogenarian” can only be Cohen the Barbarian or at most another member of the Silver Horde.

I mean, what other octogenarians would be likely to go around wielding swords?

in reply to Elena ``of Valhalla''

@valhalla @Jamie Worf, Aragon, there are plenty of potential octogenarian assassins. But on a more worrying note, it's awful ageist of you to think that once one reaches a venerable age that they should lay down their arms or even want to. I like to think that my sword shall not sleep in my hand till death claims me.

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